6 Practical Tips for Caregiving When Someone You Love Is Chronically Ill

By Dr. Alex Armitage, DNP, CNL, APRN, FNP-BC Specialist in Supportive Palliative Care, and passionate advocate for holistic well-being.

So Dave and Matilda are sitting in my office. Matilda has been falling more often, and she just matter of factly says to Dave, "But you can just catch me, like you used to."

Dave doesn't laugh. He’s exhausted.

He glances at me and says quietly, "I hate to say it, doc, but this is wearing me down. What about me?"

It’s not an unfair question.

Caregiving isn’t a role most people seek out—it’s one they grow into out of love, necessity, or both. Whether you’ve stepped in gradually or were thrown into it overnight, caring for someone with a chronic illness is emotionally exhausting, logistically demanding, and often invisible to the outside world.

But it can also be deeply meaningful.

6 Tips for Caregiving

Here’s are 6 tips every caregiver should know—and a practical guide to survive the journey without losing yourself in the process.

#1: 𝗡𝗼𝗿𝗺𝗮𝗹𝗶𝘇𝗲 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗘𝗺𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀

Resentment. Guilt. Sadness. Frustration. These aren’t signs you’re failing—they’re signs you’re human. More than half of all caregivers report feeling they had no choice but to assume the role. Naming these feelings is the first step toward processing them.

🧠 Care Tip: Acknowledge emotions without judgment. Counseling, journaling, and caregiver support groups can provide perspective and relief.

#2: 𝗟𝗲𝗮𝗿𝗻 𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗡𝗲𝗲𝗱—𝗪𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗡𝗲𝗲𝗱 𝗜𝘁

A common fear among new caregivers is not knowing how to provide care. Education improves caregiver confidence and decreases stress.

🎓 Care Tip: Focus on small wins—medication management, safe transfers, scheduling, or simply understanding the diagnosis. You don’t need to know everything at once.

#3: 𝗕𝘂𝗶𝗹𝗱 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗖𝗮𝗿𝗲𝗴𝗶𝘃𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗧𝗲𝗮𝗺

You cannot do this alone—and you shouldn't. Shared caregiving protects against burnout and improves patient outcomes.

👥 Care Tip: Delegate what you can. Ask others to:

• Sit with your loved one while you rest

• Help with errands or transportation

Manage finances or logistics Respite care, paid aides, or adult day centers may also help lighten the load.

#4: 𝗦𝗲𝘁 𝗕𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗮𝗿𝗶𝗲𝘀—𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗘𝗮𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗲𝗿, 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗕𝗲𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗿

Without clear limits, caregiving becomes all-consuming. Establishing boundaries reduces emotional fatigue and protects your health.

🚧 Care Tip: Identify what you can and cannot do—physically, emotionally, and financially. Boundaries aren’t selfish; they’re self-preservation.

#5: 𝗣𝗿𝗶𝗼𝗿𝗶𝘁𝗶𝘇𝗲 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗪𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗯𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴

Caregiver burnout is a real medical risk. Caregivers are more likely to suffer from anxiety, depression, and chronic illness themselves.

💡 Care Tip: Choose a daily self-care ritual:

• A walk, a podcast, or a few minutes of silence

• Exercise, deep breathing, music, prayer

• Journaling, stretching, drinking your coffee while it’s still hot

Whatever restores you, do more of it. Even 10 minutes helps.

#6: 𝗙𝗼𝗰𝘂𝘀 𝗼𝗻 𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗽𝗼𝘀𝗲, 𝗡𝗼𝘁 𝗣𝗲𝗿𝗳𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻

You don't have to love every moment of caregiving to find meaning in it. Reflecting on your values—like compassion, commitment, or family—can give you a deeper sense of purpose.

🌱 Care Tip: Ask yourself:

• “What do I want to remember about this time?”

• “What am I teaching my children, my community, or myself through this?”

Focus on what matters most, not on doing everything perfectly.

Find more caregiver resources and links to helpful organizations under the Guides Section at Inyangahealth.com